Have you ever found yourself googling “how to change your mindset”?
What brought you to start searching for answers? Too much negative thinking? Feeling unhappy?
Well done on recognising that you need to start changing your thinking, that’s a great start, but the big question is how exactly is it done?
Powerful mindset
Re-Framing – have you heard of it? The concept is quite simple in that you literally re-frame what it is you are thinking or saying to yourself.
It is a powerful mindset strategy to bring about both confidence and Self-Belief.
How often do you talk to yourself like this; “What if I don’t get the chores done today, what will my family think of me?”, “What if I speak up, and say what I really think, what will people think of me?”, “what if I give an answer in the meeting and everyone stares at me?” It’s a negative thought process, isn’t it?
Self-talk and Self-belief
Negative self-talk can spiral into complete lack of self-belief, where we start to fall into the trap of the “should and should not’s”, trying to out guess what others think of us because of the voices in our head telling us things we think we believe to be true – when they’re probably not!
If you say what you really feel – and you can without guilt – others will get over it, it is ok to have a different view on life!
How to change your mindset? Time to re-frame those thoughts!
One thing we can do to help us in these moments is to re-frame what we say to ourselves and the thoughts we burden ourselves with.
Do you ever get terrified of going to a meeting?
How many times have you had to attend a meeting for work and thought “what if they all know more than me, what if I look silly”.
Well, if you weren’t any good at your job, you wouldn’t be in it and you wouldn’t be asked to attend the meeting I the first place. You’ve been asked to attend because you have something to contribute, so be proud of that and YOU know your job, they don’t!
So why aren’t you going into that meeting believing in your abilities and confident you will be able to answer any questions that come your way?
Fear of judgement, fear of looking silly?
These are all negative patterns and emotions that have been as a result of your collective experiences over your life.
Here’s how you can re-frame it:
“What if I look silly and I don’t know the answer to a question?” to “If I don’t have the information to hand, I will say so and advise that I will look into it and get back to them at the earliest opportunity”.
How different do these two thought processes sound? We wouldn’t necessarily have every piece of information about everything we do with us in one moment so have the confidence to offer it when you can.
Which one would you choose? Which one do you WANT to choose?
Whatever your thoughts, whatever the words you hear yourself saying, when they are your lack of self-belief talking and you are talking to yourself in a negative way, take a moment to stop, re-word the thought in your head and re-frame any negativity to positivity! See just how amazing it feels to see your cup half full and not half empty and you really believe in yourself.
It’s a wonderful feeling and one you won’t want to swap back to.
If you find yourself slipping don’t worry, just remind yourself that no, negative way of thinking, you have no place here anymore and I re-frame you to be positive!
