When the hugger needs a hug!

Sometimes, the hugger just needs a hug. It’s as simple as that.

I know that it’s all about putting out a message of positivity and I try not to remain in the negative and despondent energy that I carried for many years, but sometimes, just sometimes, things get to you and it simply all just came to a kind of boiling point recently.

I’d had a tough week with the children, my daughter wasn’t feeling great my son was struggling to go to school and for various other reasons that I’m sure every family deal with on a daily basis, I ran out of the smiley, happy, “I’ve got my shiz together”!

There has definitely been a low kind of energy around – including the weather! It was wonderful at the start of the week, we had clear blue unadulterated skies, it was just nice to get the sunshine and feel warm, but then towards the end of the week it just got grey, overcast, and rainy – again. On the school run that morning there was a whole new level of stupid with people doing crazy things and by the time I had dropped my son to school I just felt like I was “broken”!

It had just got too much

So, when a fellow Mum asked the usual “how are you”, I just broke down on her!! (I’ve known her a long time though).

But you know what, sometimes as Mums it happens. You just need to release it all and don’t get me wrong, my husband is amazing and very understanding, but sometimes you just need another mum who understands, who gets you in the circumstances that you are currently in.

Your fellow Mums have an understanding, an empathy and know that sometimes you just need a release. That’s it’s okay to be vulnerable, they know that you know it’s going to pass, and you’ll soon be back to good times but that for now, you simply need someone to just give you a hug and let YOU know it’s going be okay.

Because if you hold it in, you fester, and it doesn’t serve any purpose. It doesn’t help you move on, it doesn’t help you solve something or work through the problem.

A problem shared is a problem halved

The old cliche of a problem shared is a problem halved is for the most part true! It gives you permission to step out of the situation just for a moment and see it with a clearer head. For you to understand why you are feeling this way and to give you a little more clarity to be able to move forward.

I was going to say deal with the situation, but I think it’s more a case of just step out of it and find a solution instead of taking that burden home with you again.

That wonderful woman told me “you know what, I hear you, I understand, I get you, it’s going to be okay, you know you’re a great mum, you can do this”.

So, with gratitude, I took that amazing hug, and it’s carried me into the morning to go “come on Liz, let’s sort this out”. let’s think about this and what can I do next.

I went home, had a shower and washed my hair and then sat with a hot cuppa to gather myself again.

Just by taking that time was able to re-energize myself. If I had stayed in that mindset and got angry and wound up like a coil, I would be no good to myself or anyone else!

Recognise your emotions

But, it is good to recognise and to understand that every emotion is a valid emotion and that perhaps you just need to tell someone that it’s really s***! We have it drummed into us most of our lives that we mustn’t be angry, or sad, or frustrated but we simply cannot be 100% happy clappy all the time.

You ARE a good Mum and you deserve a hug!

Being able to recognise your emotions, be kind to yourself, know that you are a good mum and you have so totally got this even when you feel you haven’t is what drives you forward When you have Rediscovered YOU and know how she works and what makes her tick, you can hold your head high, love yourself and go shine your light as far as you can – after your hug of course.

We’ve got you.

Lots of love – and hugs, Liz x